*Edit* So, I got all clever with my picture formatting and had all these small pictures organzied nearly around a medium sized picture. Well, then I switched my blog layout and it messed up my picture formatting. Basically, what I'm saying is: I'm too tired to fix it, so deal with it. :)
I have so much to write about! I've been so so very busy, and even now I should not be on the computer, since my house needs attention, but I just have to connect to you all again. Since my last post a lot has gone on, and I want to tell you all everything, but I'll probably do it in a few posts, so that you don't get overwhelmed!
I'll start with retreat, and then over the next couple days I want to blog about following (and bug me if I take too long to get to it):
~Marley- how cute she is, how much she drives me crazy, and new pictures!
~San Jose with the family, including new family pictures that I took for us.
~Improvements to the house that we've made.
~Most importantly - what God has been doing in my life, especially through the book
Crazy Love by Francis Chan.
But for tonight... high school retreat!
This year was my second year going on retreat, and it was awesome, awesome, awesome. My first year was so great, but this year beat it, hands down. We went to Hartland, and the chapel speaker was the youth pastor from one of the Hanford churches. It was so incredible being up in the mountains surrounded by God's creation. The best part was that there were no cell phone towers nearby! Okay... not the best part, but it was REALLY nice not having to deal with the kids and their phones. The downside, of course, was that I couldn't talk to Kyle the entire time, and I'm pretty sure that's the longest I've gone without talking to him in over five years!
I had a cabin of awesome girls, and we had some really great conversations in the cabin, especially on the last night (we stayed up past 3 am!). It's great being able to get to know the kids a little deeper than we normally get at school. Plus, we (the teachers) get to let our guard down a bit and the students get to see another side of us, to a certain degree. I think it's really helpful for the students to see us like that periodically, and realize that we really do love them and care for them, and we're not just homework assigning tyrants! These are my girls that I had in my cabin. Oh, and it was cold up there, if you couldn't tell...
Hartland was just beautiful, and they also had some fun things for the kids to do. They have a shuffleboard area, so we all played like we were retired and on a cruise. :) There's also a swing that the kids (and teachers!) loved playing on. You can get really high and kick the tree branches above you, but you really need some help, preferably from two boys.
Other fun things included horse shoes, Frisbee, tether ball, and paddle boats that sank, especially if you tried to pile 6 boys in one.
Hartland also has a giant swing (different from the other one) that swings out over the river, and I got some great pictures of the kids on it. I love their reactions as they pull the cord that releases them! They also have a zipline, and it is the greatest zipline I've ever seen, simply because they let two people on at a time, and when two people are on it, they are pretty much guaranteed to get wet! The medium sized picture of the two boys below- they hit the water so soon because of their combined weight that they were dragged through the water and ended up getting stuck, so they had to be rescued. Oh, and that water was COLD!
And now, the best part of camp. Every morning and evening we had chapel, and the pastor spoke about faith. It was the perfect thing for our students to hear, and honestly, for me as well. He used Hebrews 11 (of course), but also spoke about getting out of the boat. Having faith enough to get out of the boat. I think his message really resonated with a lot of the students, and I'm praying that the decisions they made at camp continue now that they are down off the mountain. All too often we experience the 'camp high' or have the 'mountain top experience' and then nothing in our life changes when we get back home. I know for some of our students, the message really hit them, and their lives are going to be changed. Some of the others, I'm praying that they really meant it when they said they are ready to get out of the boat. One night in chapel the speaker gave the students the opportunity to write their name on a post-it if they felt the were really ready to live with faith, and get out of the boat. The next morning when we came in to chapel, this is what we saw:
One of the seniors brought all the names back home, and he made it into a permanent cross that's now on display in the locker room.
The other really cool thing that's done every year at camp is done at the last night's campfire. If you want, on the last day you pick up a stick and carry it with you the rest of the day. Then at the campfire, the students have the chance to share what their stick means - something they're struggling with that they need to give over to God, some sin they want to give up, their fears, or whatever it is that they need to give up to God. Then, as a symbolic gesture, the stick is put in the campfire. Or, they can just put it in without sharing. This year was incredibly intense. Some of the stuff that they shared - WOW. I was blown away by some of the things my students are going through or have gone through that I never would have guessed. Huge stuff that was so foreign to me growing up, and that no kid should have to go through. I wish some of them would have shared in a less public setting, though, because it was huge stuff that really only a few, close accountability partners need to know. However, I hope now that the rest of the students know what their friends are going through they'll step up and encourage and hold their friends accountable.
I used the opportunity that night to share with the kids as well. So many of them think that, or act as if all their problems will go away because they put the stick in and gave it over to God one night. So I shared with them that it is a daily process, and some times a minute by minute ordeal of giving it over to God. I shared with them my stick, which represented my plans. I told them all that if I would have had things my way, I would be at home with a baby. A few of them knew that Kyle and I had been trying to start a family, but for the majority of them (and some of the staff members) it was the first time they knew anything. I shared with them that despite the fact I still desperately ache for a child, I know that God's plan is so much better than mine, and it's a daily process of giving up my will and my plans in exchange for His. After all, if I already had a baby, I might not be teaching this year. And I am so, so in love with my classes and students and now I can't imagine not having them this year. Already it makes me want to cry thinking that I only have a few short months left with this senior class. I seriously love these kids so much and don't want them to leave me! Can I fail them all?
After the campfire, I received some great encouragement from a few students, and it helps make our whole ordeal more worthwhile. I had one student tell me he was sorry I got stuck with them instead of a baby, but that he was really glad I was his teacher. And then one of the girls in my cabin told me that she was selfishly glad that I was not a mother yet, and explained that if I was not at the school, many of the students would not have a teacher they felt comfortable talking with and seeking advice from. Talk about a compliment. I already knew I was at KCS for a reason, and knew that part of that reason was so the students would have a teacher they felt comfortable around. There's one other (young) teacher that the students also talk to, but the rest of the staff is of the older generation, and the kids generally don't want to talk to them about problems. It's really too bad, too, because my coworkers are wonderful, godly people and I've learned TONS from them. But, I guess at 16 it's easier to talk to someone in their twenties than in their fifties or older. It's really great hearing from my students that they are glad I'm teaching and that they feel comfortable enough that they would come to me if they had a problem and needed advice. This, I think, is why I want to stay at a private school. The pay sucks, but I can teach them in so many areas of life that I could never ever mention at a public school. I love that I'm able to be a positive influence on these kids, and show them that you can be young and live a fun, wonderful life that's also completely sold out to Christ. My goal at KCS is to give them the best English education I possibly can, but more than that, I want to inspire them to live wholeheartedly for Christ, and have a passionate, exhilarating love-life with their Creator.
Well, there you go. That, in a nutshell, was camp. I got sooooo many good pictures (I'm now known as the school paparazzi :) ) and had a great time just lovin on my students. And now, it's time to go get a little more cleaning done before bed. Or, I might just go watch tv. :)